Monday, December 6, 2010

Letting go of "Angry"

Anger and frustration are snaky little “emotions”. It can be seemingly easy to allow anger to take over and control our actions and reactions, but aren’t we only succeeding in adding unnecessary chaos into our life?

When I was a teenager, I was full of anger and frustration; aren’t we all at that age?! I came to a point where began to believe that I achieved more of what I “wanted” when I portrayed myself in that manner; a hard shell that was easily provoked. Being mad was normal then and at times showed up as violence as well. Of course, now I see the reality of those days, feelings and the role I created for myself, they only succeeded in causing more things to BE angry and frustrated ABOUT!

Then, I moved onto where I am now; the anger and frustrations can still exist, but I don’t allow them to show their faces in the way I used to. Now, I hold them tightly inside, where they fight with each other for space as each continues to grow. Sure, I get mad, but now I keep the frustrations of it all quiet, only letting loose at times that tend to appear out of the blue.

Because it is! I let go when I am caught up INSIDE myself with OTHER thoughts, and so, as the story goes, I am not releasing that which is really bothering me!

It is a dangerous little path to follow. When we really have other things that are on our plate, instead of voicing those problems, giving a name to them and acknowledging them, we end up exploding on those around us in a situation so un-equal to that which is playing in our minds. We leave those around us shocked and confused.

I certainly don’t need to hold onto any feelings of anger, I know that is pointless. Frustrations are another story. I am responsible for any frustrations I have, I make the choice on how I will be affected by a given situation; If I don’t like it, I have the responsibility to myself to do what is required to make the change. I also don’t desire to hurt those around me with nasty words that have nothing to do with them.

I know I have work to do but I also know that there are many others who should get to work as well! And it will take some time to really get there. I need to learn to not blame others for situations that I may very well have contributed to as well, and accept that we all have things to work on within ourselves. I need to DEAL with what bothers me or LET IT GO instead of keeping it all inside where it has the ability to pop up at anytime.

A little more compassion and understanding; acceptance and thoughtful insight; we are all learning, and sometimes, we just need a little help to see that.

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